I'm a human trainer!

I am the best human trainer ever! So Dad hurt his back 2 weeks ago... He's been screaming, angry, whiny, and on lots of medicine! Luckily my cute "I want a treat" eyes still work on him.

I haven't been getting the attention I deserve! No long walks during the week, no play dates with Max and Belle. This is puppy abuse! So I got bored in the middle of the night. They can't expect me to sleep all day in my condo, then sleep all night!

Then the light bulb went off... I started barking like I had to emergency potty in the middle of the night. It was like magic, Mom jumped out of bed and took be for a walk. What fun! There are lots of furry little critters out there at night. We even heard some raccoons fighting. They sounded nasty.

I managed to get a walk every night for 6 days straight. Sure they moved my mealtimes, restricted my water, took away all my chewies so I wasn't thirsty at night, etc All very little prices to pay for the wondrous walk.

So Friday night I decided it was time for a walk at 12:30. Woof Woof I go! Mom put a coat and shoes on and took me to the elevator (no one is coordinated enough to go down 5 flights of stairs at that hour)

When we got outside Mom wouldn't let me go on a walk! She kept walking me in a 15 foot circle right outside the door. She seriously can't expect me to potty right there. So I planted my feet and tried to pull to go on our walk, it didn't help. After 7 minutes of me refusing to sniff (seriously my nose couldn't go any farther skyward, pretty stars were out...) She took me back inside!!!!!!!!!!!

But wait, I hadn't peed yet! *grumble grumble*

We went back inside, lights went out, and everyone went back to sleep. I started my pitiful little whine... slowly worked up to a single loud bark.... SPLAT! I got hit with a stream of water! So surprised I crashed into the wall. Those stupid humans really didn't need to laugh at me... Insulted I went to my dog bed and flopped down with a huge disdained groan.

Mom said she better not wake up to an accident! She was mad... Geez all I wanted was a fun walk.

Last night I let everyone sleep until they had to wake me up! ok, well I was awake but was fake sleeping in the living room. Mom was so happy, telling me I was such a good pup at 6:40 this morning! After we came inside from pottying I even got a special super duper yummy bone! I never get them in the morning! Num Num Num. This is the bone I will do anything for. Trust me, for someone that is not food motivated this is a big deal.

So I trained my humans to give me my favorite bone to chew on while they take shower and get ready to go to that work place. I'm so smart...